Grief, revisited
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It has been just over a year since my dad died from ALS. I really miss him. He was so funny, was able to play self-deprecation and then also let you know he was smarter than you unbelievably well. The guy was so well-read. He could recall news articles from years ago, he read all the classics. He read the New Yorker religiously. He was an avid sports fan, loved all Boston sports teams and Tom Brady. He would have really loved watching this Celtics run, and been very frustrated with the Bruins. He would have cried along with me watching my son at his recent dance recital and would have made fun of me in the process. There are a thousand things I miss about him.
I wrote this days after he died, and wanted to revisit it. If you are going through a hard time or are grieving please don’t hesitate to reach out to me, woocomedyweek@gmail.com.
Dear Shaun,
It’s Shaun. I understand you are going through a real tough time. If you don’t know, you’re dad died. That must real tough, I know how much he meant to you. From what I’ve been gathering so far, you have been handling it by making a lot of jokes and doing a bunch of bits. That’s good for now, but you really need to face this head on at some point or it’s going to bubble up into something heinous or at least negative for your life and family.
So yes, doing something chaotic and then when questioned about it saying, “it’s what dad would have wanted,” is a great line but not productive in the grieving process. So instead of talking about how you are the man of the house now, but have low T, so you’ll need to tan your testicles, talk to a therapist. I know, I know, it’s what dad would have wanted.
Buying the 12 foot skeleton from Home Depot with LCD lights is not a good replacement either. You can’t replace your dad. He was a one of a kind, larger than life man. He taught how to play sports, how to be kind, generous, thoughtful, he pushed you to be a better person. This skeleton is cool and will be a highlight in the neighborhood, but he is not your dad. Please give the skeleton a different name, Tim, Pop, or Grub won’t do, those all have to do with your dad.
Your dad definitely, for the most part, enjoyed all your antics. He definitely would have been laughing or lovingly rolling his eyes at all of this. But you should properly miss him. Remember all of the goofy times you had with him. His goofy dancing, where he looked like he was pumping a water pump. His terrible singing, to wake you up in high school. The way he would sing “Cats in the Cradle” as I would leave to go out with my friends. The way he would sometimes no sell my jokes to make me feel on edge. The one time he accidentally got his tie stuck in a paper shredder. All of it.
He was always a calming presence in your life and you need to fill that void yourself. Be more like your dad.
All that being said should I get a cat?
Dear Shaun,
Thanks man. Don’t get a cat.
NEWS
The big thing to look forward to is The Sort of Late Show on May 31! It is jam packed with great stuff. We will have Reporter Matt of WBZ. Check his stuff here. We also have Ellen Benson of WooSkates as a guest. We will be premiering a music video from Jake McKelvie (that I also happen to star in). Jake will also be the musical guest that night. Paul Henry from Cleveland, by way of Worcester, by way of Brooklyn will be our comedian. Plus there are a bunch of other surprises in store. It is going to be so fun. I have physical tickets to buy if you don’t like fees, hit me up! But online tickets can also be purchased here.
