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Dear Shaun,
Baseball season is starting this week, and I know you love the sport. Is there any reason for me to like it? I’m not opposed to it, it just has never grabbed me. Is this something I should try harder at? Is it worth it?
-Take Me Out to the Ballgame
Dear Take me Out to the Ballgame,
You’re right I do love baseball. I love it a whole lot. However I do recognize that to some people, loving baseball is like going out dressing in a Steampunk aesthetic: there’s nothing inherently wrong about it, you just don’t understand how they got to that point in their life. You question if you can commit to anything as strongly as they commit to wearing that many layers.
Baseball is a lot like Steampunk. It borrows from a different era, and when people like it, they really like it, and you can’t put your finger on it but there is definitely a subset of fans who are probably racist? All of these are valid reasons to feel skeptical about the sport. However it can be such a passive fandom. There is enough break in the action to sit and talk with friends, read a book, do a crossword, or walk out of the room to make dinner.
It’s one of the few sports that actually makes sense to listen to on the radio. Have you ever tried to listen to hockey or basketball? It makes my head spin. With baseball, though, it is easy. Pitcher throws the ball and one of three things happen: it is a ball, it is a strike or the ball has been hit. You can picture all of that. Plus, there is so much waiting around for action that when something does happen the radio announcer will raise their voice and you know to clue in.
There are 30 teams, and 162 games for each of them, and you can try and watch all of them or just watch a couple a week and you’ll get it. Truly, you can be really into a team or the sport in general and watch 30 regular season games and still be considered an avid fan. The broadcasts have recaps like they do before “prestige television” episodes. Just dip your toe in once a week to check the water and you are a baseball fan.
I will concede, the rules can be a lot. Don’t worry about it, just message me any questions. If I can be the ambassador to a brand new wave of fans, I would be honored. I understand baseball is sort of a four-plus-another-four letter word around these parts because of the glut that sits on Green Island, but the game is cool, and I hope you can join in my fandom.
Finally, there is definitely crying in baseball—don’t let America’s Sweetheart Tom Hanks fool you. I cry a lot watching. Cathartic cries. There is always a story to be moved by. A player recently called up to play in the majors for the first time hours after his grandmother dies. Or a manager trying to stick up for a player who’s career was ended by a dirty play. Or a dad watching his son pitch in his first major league inning. To quote Moneyball, “How can you not be romantic about baseball?”
This sport is unpredictable, full of surprises and features a lot of men spitting. It is a one-night stand without the pregnancy scare!
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NEWS
Thank you to everyone who came out to support The Roast of Worcester, it was a smashing success. Everyone who performed did great and we were able to raise $1,720 for Compassionate Care ALS!
Me? This Saturday I am at Democracy Brewing in Boston. There are a lot of people in the city from out of town for the Boston Comedy Festival so there could be some cool drop-ins. You can get tickets here.
Also, Monday April 1st I’ll be guest hosting the Dirty Gerund Poetry Open Mic at Ralph’s Rock Diner and attempting to bring the same sort of “Ruckus” that is always brought. That should be a ton of fun as well.
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